Vietnamese table manners: Traditions and unspoken rules

The Vietnamese dining table is more than just a place to share meals. It is where family bonds grow stronger and traditional values are passed down through generations. Here are some Vietnamese table manners you should keep in mind.

1. Core rules of Vietnamese table etiquette

1.1. Respect

Respect is the foundation of Vietnamese culture in general and Vietnamese table manners in particular, symbolizing family hierarchy and gratitude toward elders and guests. At a traditional Vietnamese meal, guests wait for the host to assign seats, as each position reflects age and status. The eldest or most honored person sits and starts eating first, followed by others. Serving food to elders before yourself and using both hands when offering dishes are gestures of courtesy. Polite language and gentle actions, such as saying “moi ong/ba/bac” (please, go ahead) or slightly bowing the head before eating, convey sincere respect at the table.

Vietnamese table manners reflect the nation’s deep-rooted family values

In Vietnamese table manners, sharing plays a central role in creating connection at every meal. Dishes are placed in the center so everyone can reach and enjoy together, reflecting unity. Visitors are welcomed into the circle and invited to enjoy the same dishes. When visiting a Vietnamese home as a guest, you can show politeness by offering food to others before serving yourself, gently turning dishes so everyone can reach them, or adding food to another’s bowl as a gesture of affection. This way of sharing food encourages conversation and a sense of togetherness.

1.3. Mindfulness

Mindfulness is an essential part of table manners in Vietnam, showing respect for both the food and the people who share it. Meals are meant to be enjoyed slowly, allowing time for conversation and appreciation rather than haste. Listening attentively when others speak and complimenting the dishes prepared by the host are also thoughtful ways to express respect at the table. You can show mindfulness by putting your phone away, focusing on the food and the people around you, and taking small bites instead of eating quickly.

1.4. Politeness

In Vietnamese dining culture, politeness reflects mutual respect shared around the table. During the meal, courtesy is shown through small gestures such as passing dishes with both hands, waiting until everyone is served, and staying at the table until the others have finished.

Good posture and calm behavior also express respect. Diners should sit upright, avoid shaking legs or resting elbows on the table, chew quietly, and not talk with food in their mouth. Putting phones aside and eating at a steady pace helps maintain a polite dining atmosphere.

Following table manners in Vietnam helps make the meal feel more refined

>>> Explore: Cultural values in Vietnam: A guide for non-Vietnamese

2. Key things to know about Vietnamese table manners

2.1. What to say when eating in Vietnam

Knowing what to say during a meal in Vietnam helps create a warm atmosphere. Before eating, the host often invites everyone with a friendly phrase like “Moi ca nha an com” (let’s enjoy the meal together). Guests can respond with “Cam on, moi moi nguoi” (thank you, please enjoy) to show appreciation. During the meal, light conversation is encouraged. Compliments such as “Mon nay ngon qua” (this dish is delicious) show genuine enjoyment. Asking about the food, such as how it was prepared, reflects interest and shows respect for the cook.

It is also polite to avoid talking loud, interrupting others, or speaking with food in the mouth. Moreover, it is important to refrain from criticizing or pointing out each other’s faults, arguing, or bringing up shocking, heavy, or sensitive topics such as politics or religions. Instead, conversations should focus on cheerful stories or future plans, expressing care and encouragement among family members. In this way, the meal becomes an opportunity to strengthen bonds and create a warm, welcoming atmosphere.

>>> Explore: Vietnamese family meals: An authentic culinary tradition tour

2.2. Vietnamese utensil etiquette

Vietnamese chopsticks are the main eating utensil in Vietnamese meals and play an important role in Vietnamese table manners. Here is how to use them correctly:

Do’s

Use a set of unused chopsticks, or reverse the ones you are already using when serving food to others.
Place food into your own bowl before eating rather than eating directly from the dishes.

Don’ts

Stick chopsticks vertically into rice.
Tap chopsticks on bowls.
Point chopsticks at others.
Spear food with chopsticks.
Chew or lick chopsticks.
Wave chopsticks over shared dishes.
Pass food directly from your chopsticks to someone else’s.
Use uneven or mismatched chopsticks.
Hold chopsticks in your mouth.

Additional notes

It is acceptable to use chopsticks like a knife to cut soft foods for children.
For foods like spring rolls, it is acceptable to use your hands instead of chopsticks.
When resting chopsticks, lay them neatly across your bowl or on a chopstick rest, never upright.
Spoons used for soup should be placed upside down in the bowl, not facing up.

2.3. Vietnamese dining etiquette

Understanding table manners in Vietnam helps guests show respect for the food, host, and fellow diners. Some important rules to follow include:

Sit upright and keep legs still, avoiding fidgeting under the table.
Eat at a moderate pace to join conversations and show appreciation for the meal.
Hold your rice bowl with one hand and avoid spilling the food while eating.
When serving rice, avoid scooping a large portion at once.
Keep noises low and finish the food on your plate; wasting is impolite.
Wait for the host or elderly to start eating and stay until most have finished.
Avoid picking through shared dishes to choose your favorite piece, as it is considered rude.

2.4. Vietnamese drinking etiquette

What are some things I should know about Vietnamese table manners when drinking? Drinking etiquette goes hand in hand with Vietnamese table setting, helping guests show respect.

Always drink in moderation; excessive drinking is considered impolite.
During a toast, hold your glass with both hands (or support one hand with the other) and make eye contact with the person you are toasting with.
Keep your glass slightly lower than that of older people; raising it higher may show a lack of respect.
Offer drinks to others and take only a small sip during the toast; afterwards, drink at a comfortable pace.

Avoid excessive drinking at a Vietnamese dinner table

>>> More on: Vietnamese family dinner: Facts and an insight into customs

2.5. Other noteworthy rules

In addition to the main practices, there are subtle gestures that reflect Vietnamese eating manners and show respect for the host and other diners. Observing these small customs helps maintain harmony and leaves a positive impression during the meal.

Chopsticks and spoons are the primary eating utensils. If you need other utensils, just ask.
Inform your host of any allergies, dietary restrictions, or preferences to ensure a pleasant dining experience.
After the meal, express gratitude by thanking the host, complimenting the food, and offering to help with cleanup.

FAQs about Vietnamese table manners

Am I expected to eat all the food on my plate?

Not necessarily. Leaving a small portion when eating pho or noodles is acceptable and can signal that you are full and satisfied.

Yes. Always use serving utensils or the opposite ends of your chopsticks when taking food from shared plates.

How do I show respect to the host?

Compliment the food, thank the host before and after the meal, and wait until the eldest person has finished before standing up.

What should I do if I drop food or spill something?

Just clean it up; most hosts will be understanding.

Can I politely say no to a dish I don’t want to eat?

Yes. You can politely say, “No, thank you,” with a smile.

Harmony, simplicity, and closeness have long been at the heart of Vietnamese meals. Observing proper Vietnamese table manners helps strengthen relationships and is essential for everyone at the table.

After learning about table manners in Vietnam, you can now feel confident in taking your food tour through Vietnam. In Ha Long, Hoi An, Nha Trang, and Phu Quoc, every meal tells a story of local flavors.

For an unforgettable stay in those destinations, choose the hotels and resorts of Vinpearl, where modern amenities and top-tier services create a perfect blend of comfort and sophistication. Guests can also enjoy fine dining, spas, and beachfront views. Then, make your journey even more exciting with a visit to VinWonders, a vibrant paradise for entertainment that offers exciting games and captivating shows for all ages.